


It's really impractical to forget a secret society, so let's not

by StarishSparkles



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:01:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25944781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarishSparkles/pseuds/StarishSparkles
Summary: [SET GRADUATION EPISODE 21]The thundermen write a letter to themselves just in case they forget the Unbroken Chain after the tribunalThis is just something I kept thinking about when listening to the episode
Comments: 5
Kudos: 25





	It's really impractical to forget a secret society, so let's not

**Author's Note:**

> This is written before ep 22 comes out, so if it ages badly I apologise lmao

' _Dear Fitzroy_

_ I'd write your full title, but I think we both know it like the back of our hands by now. If you're reading this letter we've failed, and that isn't the most comforting thought but I digress.  _

_So. Let me start from the beginning_.' 

Fitzroy pulled off his glasses and rubbed his eyes, groaning quietly. He needed to write this letter before tonight (they had no more classes for the day, thankfully), but he didn't know how to start! He knew himself too well, if he found a letter on his desk saying impossible things he'd either dismiss it or throw himself into a paranoid spiral that wouldn't help anybody. From the other room, he could hear Argo and the Firbolg discussing a possible plan - what they'd all been doing before he excused himself - and sat up in his chair to reread his letter. 

He'd written and crossed out six different lines by the time Argo appeared behind him. "What are you writing over here?" Fitzroy startled, and knocked over a bottle of ink that poured itself over his letter and more importantly, started to stain his wooden desk.

"Oh no, no nonono.. " The next few seconds were a flurry of dabbing at the ink with a handkerchief, and although the aesthetic of the desk was beyond salvation it really wasn't that big of a spill as Argo had grabbed the bottle and righted it as soon as it fell. Fitzroy dropped his handkerchief over the destroyed letter with a disappointed sigh, then did it again for effect as Argo rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. 

"Sorry Fitz, I forgot how quiet I am sometimes." Fitzroy looked up at Argo, shrugging as he daintily wiped the remaining ink off his fingers with the edge of the cloth. 

"We really should put bells on your ankles, Argo, then we'd hear you coming! Although then you'd be absolutely atrocious at sneaking around, huh? Seems like a net loss for Thundermen LLC to me, if our rogue can't be sneaky." Argo had looked like he was considering it, but as the Firbolg reminded them from the other room that it was important to not sully the company name he shook his head and laughed. 

"That's a good point! Oh- I came to ask, Fitz, whatcha writing? It seems to be causing you, uh, some trouble there." Fitzroy looked back at the remainder of the letter on the desk a tad dryly, and sighed as he got out another piece of paper and began to tap his quill against it.

From his place on Fitzroy's pillow, Snippers clacked away to himself. 

"The thing is, I figured if we fail the tribunal tonight-" they both glanced at Gary, who was humming a little tune and seemed to be paying them no mind, "-then we could use some written evidence of the Unbroken whatsit in case they're related to this demon prince sugarshow." At Argo's confused expression, he elaborated, "You know, shi-shitshow? Dang, I ruined it. Anyway, I thought that I could write a letter for us to find in case everything goes really south tonight." 

The Firbolg appeared at the door, and they both waved half-heartedly as he came over. "What… are you trying to write." Fitzroy explained, and the Firbolg thought deeply for a moment before reaching over to the paper and patting one large paw against it. "Make a list. It… will help you to organise." Argo nodded, pulled up a chair and sat down on it backwards with his chin resting on his hands, and cracked his knuckles. Fitzroy shuddered and the Firbolg inched away. 

"Let's get down to business." 

An hour later, they had a finished list, a bullet-pointed letter consisting of everything Argo knew (or at least that he could recall, it wasn't like he could've taken notes) about the Unbroken Chain, including a detailed sketch of his tattoo courtesy of the Firbolg. They'd also started a second list scribbled in the margins, of reasons why their future selves should believe the letter was legitimate. Fitzroy had written 'handwriting?', then Argo had offered up that Higglemas had done something similar with memory wiping so they might find it easier to believe than they thought, and the Firbolg made a comment that this seemed to be a common theme in this school and perhaps they should wear tin foil hats. 

Once the letter had been drafted they had a quick snack break (a lime, a handful of berries and a chocolate bar) and got back to work, Argo scribing as Fitzroy read off what they'd previously written - 'he'd already written the list and the draft, it was someone else's turn' he'd argued - and it was soon finished, leaving only the Firbolg's job. He wrote his own little part, a confirmation that the letter was real, as it couldn't hurt to have the extra chance of it being believed. 

Fitzroy stood up and pulled out a crisp envelope from a box of fancy stationery, and slipped the letter inside. There was a pause, and he looked to the others for a second. "Do you think we could put in a secret? Like, something we could never fake? We don't have to show each other, I just… I've become very paranoid since joining this school - with good reason! - and I really think we need to keep on top of this shady secret organisation." They each nodded, and silently they wrote their own part on paper Argo had torn. 

Once they were inside the envelope, Fitzroy sealed it with hot wax and wrote their names on the front, with a frankly absurd amount of exclamation points after each one. "Well, now that's that over and done with," Argo stood up and stretched, crop top riding up, and the Firbolg muttered something along the lines of 'always with the midriff' before Argo continued, "Where do we put it? Because we can't leave it in here, in case somebody comes into our room while we're at the tribunal." he glanced at Gary again, but the gargoyle was reading a little Gary-sized newspaper and seemed to be doing his own thing in the corner, so he turned back. "Maybe under a rock?" 

The Firbolg shook his head, pointing out that they'd never find it if they really forgot, and between them ruled out the cafeteria (too likely to be intercepted by the cleaning staff), the stables (although it was a good hiding place, they didn't visit often) and the bar (somebody would definitely see them hiding the letter) before Fitzroy stood up, snapped his fingers, and rushed over to his bookshelf, pulling out his notebook of farspeech.

He opened it to the last page and grinned up at them. "Rainer! If we give her the letter I'm confident she won't open it, and it will be safe from intruders what with all the sleepless animal skeletons running around!" At the last part he looks equal parts horrified and ecstatic, and the others agree about the idea. He quickly sent a request to meet in her room, and she replied that she was in class but would be free in half an hour. 

In the meantime they decided to go and talk to Sabor, the tortle librarian Argo knew was a part of the Unbroken Chain, so Fitzroy ushered them out of the room with a smile and the letter tucked under his cloak. 

Maybe this tribunal wouldn't go too badly, then they wouldn't need the letter at all! 

Yeah, here's hoping. 


End file.
